Friday, January 30, 2015

Strong?

 

There are days when being this is liberating, freeing, and empowering. 

Then,
there is today.

When it is none of those things.

Monday, January 26, 2015

3/14 Steak & Blowjob day? Who knew!?

We are out with some of my Man's guy friends and one friend comments how there is a special day one month after Valentine's Day.   We are all drawing a blank.

"March 14th, Steak and Blowjob Day!  You know, Valentine's for the guy."

We all laugh.  My Man gives me a smile.  One of those shit eating grins.  So, I take it a little further for him.

We call that Friday.
 I say.

Or Wednesday.
My Man continues.

What's today?  Thursday??  We call that Thursday too!  Just not with steak.

His friends get a good laugh.  I get a little more honesty off my chest with the spectators unknowing if I am full of shit or a real good catch.  My Man knows the answer =)

As my Man and I walk out he says
So, how has my sex-blogging wife not heard of "Steak and Blowjob Day"?!

My answer,  
Honey, my blogger people give blowjobs daily.  They don't need a special day.

So, for all of you amazing wives who could call every single day "Steak and Blowjob Day"  dust off those knees and keep at it!!

Thursday, January 22, 2015

It hurt my heart more than my bottom.

This post will be very disorganized, I have so many thoughts to get out and just no way I can think to organize them.  

With a round of maintenance spanking already having occurred, my bottom was toasty.  The position he put me in was one of surrender and submission, flat on my stomach, mouth covered leaning my head back, arms placed behind me at the small of my back.  I don't think he maps these times out at all, I think that in that moment he knew how to gain my complete attention and focus- and he did it.

When my Man leaned into my ear and announced that he wanted me to feel this tomorrow and that I would NOT be forgetting my dishes anymore, I felt a million emotions run through me.

The most unexpected emotion I felt was disappointment.

My only disappointment was in myself that my actions did not reflect the love and respect I have for my Man and that because of that, he went with a decision that he hadn't wanted to go with prior.  A decision that I requested, many times, but respectfully understood that HE alone would need to make.

He peppered my sit-spots over, and over, and over.  As hard as I imagined a punishment spanking should be.  At one point I moved my hands down to cover my ass and I was given fair warning to NOT try that again.  I didn't.  I tightened my ass, I could no longer relax into it.  But I didn't move, nothing in me would have moved away.  My heart and my body knew that this was needed, however long HE decided it should last and however many times the same spot would be spanked. 

Here's the thing, I crave spankings.  TRULY crave them.  I have asked if he would please incorporate punishment spankings to our dynamic for a long time now.  Not because I will brat my way into one, but because I know spankings focus me.  He decided on maintenance spankings and they have really helped me stay calm and focused.  This time he decided he needed to take it up a notch.

Not only did him deciding on a punishment spanking shock me.  I was shocked also (maybe more so) by my reaction.  I NOW understand all you bloggers who say that punishment spankings are different.  I was unexpectedly feeling not my normal post-spanking sense of calm and release but rather I felt remorseful. 

The pain of the spanking was not the difficult part, it was knowing that I have not been doing the few things he asks of me with any regularity.  He has not been my priority and there is no reason for that. 

No matter how busy my work may keep me, I need to remember that I do have a priority to my Husband.  I touched him lovingly, thanked him, and committed to him that I would work to keep our spankings for maintenance only.

Then came the calm and the release I am used to. 

He is an amazing Man.  He loving gave me what I needed.  My heart feels thankful that my Man doesn't run from me and all my crazy.  He opens his arms and takes me where I need to be. 

I love you babe, and I love every nook and cranny of your love for me.

Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Re: My silly attempt at requesting maintenance, my "Pre-Post" and punishment *holy shit!*

My request for maintenance might have come out something to the effect of:

Is it time for bed yet? 
*insert long pause*
This ass isn't going to spank itself you know.
 *cringe*

Now, not only was I an amazing coward in telling my Man that I NEEDED maintenance but we do have a humor about us and, as I learned later, he knew what I was saying/asking.

My Man delivered my maintenance spankings all over my backside with the blind tilt.
Intense, needed and amazing.

I didn't finish my dishes as I should have (reasons I could explain but a non-issue really).
He decided to allow me to cum anyway.

Three times.  ONLY three.
One for each task I am to do each day this week.
I counted, as always.

I was allowed one more, as I didn't cum as good as he expected.
He wanted my cum on his hand, I did not deliver.
He teased me until I was ready to burst.
Then, I did.

Number 4.  Very fitting as he added a 4th task this week (swallowing his cum each day).

Something else happened too.  The order of spanking events are a little lot fuzzy but the fact that they occurred at all is just crazy to me.

I requested more maintenance as we were in the middle of our play time (first maintenance was over).

He started on my front side.
Breasts.
Thighs.
Pussy.

Turn over.
I comply.

He continues on my back side.
Ass.
Thighs.
Back.

At some point, I am requested to face the wall.
Face on the bed.
Ass in the air.
Spread my bottom cheeks for him.

And he spanks.
ALL over.
My soft parts are on fire.  Amazing, AMAZING fire.

Then, onto my belly laying flat.  He places my hands at the small of my back.
He starts in on my ass and my sit spots.
Hard focused strokes from the blind tilt, over and over.
Same spot, new spot, same spot again.
Very little let up in between. 

His hand moves over my mouth. He leans in close to my ear.


I don't want you to forget I was here tomorrow.  
I want you to sit and remember that you WILL NOT be forgetting the dishes again.

Then it started.  

My first punishment spanking. *holy shit!*

This post is already so long winded that I am going to write a new post on my punishment spanking and my reaction to it. 

Monday, January 19, 2015

Pre-posting?

This didn't happen yet, but I am going to ask my Man for something tonight.

Maintenance.

He reminds me often that being submissive doesn't mean I don't need anything or that I can't ask for things or that I can't initiate.  I agree, but it's not in my normal make up to ask for anything. 

I can do it myself. 

How the hell did I become submissive?!  I make myself laugh sometimes- but back to my pre-post...


All day long I have thought of it. 

The build-up.

The tension.

The connection.

The calm.


I don't have to just think about the things I want.  I can ask for it.

I have someone who is waiting for me.
To.
Just.
Ask.
For.
IT.


Saturday, January 17, 2015

Feeling owned in the oddest of places.

Audience participation required! 

We are at a hibachi restaurant with our kiddos and as I am making my plate I have a thought, 
"He owns me."  

Actually, I have several thoughts in the span of maybe 3 seconds. 

"He owns me."
"I must look different than everyone else. Can they see that I'm cherished?"
"I'm going to make a small plate, I can't very well offer a blow job later if I'm full."
"I am the luckiest wife on earth."
"How do I still feel beautiful when my head is pounding?!"
 (Yes, I probably do have ADD but that is besides the point.)
 
Then, I finished making my plate and sat with my Owner and my children. 
 
Here's what I want to know,  
WHERE IS THE ODDEST PLACE YOU WERE AT WHEN YOU HAD THE FEELING STRIKE YOU?  Owned or Owner, doesn't matter...
 

Saturday, January 10, 2015

Keeping tally....for REAL this time.

My Man tasked me (sometime last year) to keep track of my orgasms.  (I posted about it almost a year ago if I remember correctly).   I did a good job on and off for a while, then, life would take over and I wouldn't keep track. 

Our D/s is stronger sometimes, mild other times.  I really didn't know that he MEANT that I needed to keep track.  I was very wrong.  As new years came around he was shocked (and extremely disappointed) that I had not kept track like I was asked.  

Lesson learned.

I have been, and will continue to, keep track. 


Keep me honest folks!  Ask me where I'm at once in a while!!
26.2 Roman Numerals 1 silver plated roman numeral 26.2 mile full ...


That being said, he did up the stakes a bit.  He was discussing a discrete place for a tattoo that we could add the end of year tally to (each year).  I would absolutely lying if I said I didn't LOVE the idea! 

**Go visit subhubphx.blogspot.com  He did a recent post on the subject of submissive tattooing**